Every day throws us a new challenge. Whether it’s at work, in your platonic friendships, in romantic relationships, in family, and more. It can be challenging to balance it all, and there are days when you might feel overwhelmed. If you’re anxious or feeling emotional, I’m here to remind you that it’s okay. Showing emotion and being vulnerable does not make you a weak man. Here are four reasons why that’s true.
Showing Vulnerability Is Important
First, let’s start with the history. Culturally speaking, men are conditioned not to show much emotion unless it’s happiness or anger. Crying in front of others, or in general as a man, makes you look weak. In reality, it doesn’t make you weak, it shows strength. It takes a real man to admit that you’re going through a hard time and don’t always have it together. I’ve personally struggled with opening up and showing emotions as a man, but also a black man. I felt the pressure to handle things as they come, roll with the punches, and not disclose how I truly felt.
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As mainstream adoption of mental health grows, space has been created to be more vulnerable. Many other men and I are still getting comfortable and accustomed to being in these safe spaces and sharing our feelings. Still, when we are given a chance to engage in this dialogue, we see the benefits of how sharing our emotions can help. Before I share the benefits of vulnerability and how they can improve your life, lets describe what vulnerability is and how it might look.
What Is Vulnerability
Vulnerability is the ability to take risks, step out of your comfort zone, and challenge yourself to do something that might expose you emotionally. Some examples of how you might be vulnerable are:
● Crying in front of a loved one
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● Sharing a story or recounting a difficult time
● Opening up to someone about something you’ve never shared before
● Asking for help
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There are more, I’m sure, but those are just a few to help get you thinking about it. So now, lets cover the 4 reasons why being vulnerable doesn’t make you weak.
Builds Trust and Intimacy in Relationships
When you’re vulnerable with someone, it opens up a new layer in a relationship. Being emotionally open with someone shows that you trust them and feel comfortable sharing something you usually wouldn’t. Vulnerability is a form of intimacy that goes beyond anything sexual or romantic. You’re inviting someone to know you on a deeper level, and there’s no stronger connection than that.
Allows For Growth
After engaging in dialogue that challenges you to be honest about your emotions, you’ll find over time that it helps you grow. It provokes you to think of how you can get help, i.e., seeing a counsellor, therapist, talking with a friend, etc. When you are searching for assistance, this is a clear indicator that you’re willing to do the work to get better for yourself and the people around you. You have the appetite to keep growing and learning.
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Understand Negative Emotions
The body knows when we’ve stored too many emotions inside and reacts accordingly. When you don’t allow yourself to be vulnerable, these troubling or negative feelings can bottle up. This can be detrimental to your emotional, mental, and physical health. Taking advantage of vulnerability can help you process your emotions. Acknowledge them, sit with them, control them and use them to your advantage. You can’t appreciate the ups without the downs, and if you are human, you’ll undoubtedly have both.
Create Space For People To Fill
Not everyone stays in your life in the way you expect them to. And that’s okay. Sometimes you part ways with people who no longer align with you or make you feel comfortable. Vulnerability shines a light on those you trust and who you consider your people. When you’re vulnerable, it unlocks something unique and allows you to see who you’d like to be in your space, who makes you feel heard and seen, and who ultimately makes you feel safe. Create that space for people to show up in your life. You need them, and it’s okay to need them.
Feature image by KirstenMarie
