Welcome to Episode 50 of the Gent’s Talk podcast, where we sat down with Dr. Jessica O’Reilly. This was our first repeat guest, and no one was more deserving. Episode 20 was so enlightening we had to have another! We dove into how our daily interactions outside the bedroom affect interactions within the bedroom, porn, monogamy, and even touched on threesomes.
See Also: Gent’s Talk: Ep. 49 – A Sit-Down w/ Payton Nyquvest
Sex Is Easy
As a sexologist, Dr. Jess focuses on more than just sex when facilitating her global workshops. “Sex is the easy part. Anyone can learn how to have sex,” she stated, “it’s all about the self-esteem, self-confidence pieces.” She talked about how couples often don’t have any playfulness outside the bedroom, which makes it near impossible to have playfulness inside the bedroom. Do you have deep and meaningful conversations that reveal yourself in the kitchen, backyard or living room? If not, it only makes sense that you won’t be able to tell erotic fantasies and be comfortable unleashing those salacious thoughts in the bedroom. It boils down to trust and healthy communication.
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Sexual Fantasies
Fantasizing about someone else is normal and healthy. We learned that it is natural for our minds to wonder; just because our partner has thoughts about someone or something new does not mean they want to explore it physically. And if they do, and that’s upsetting, Dr. O’Reilly asks, “Why don’t you want your partner to experience all the riches life offers?” Conversing about introducing new things to the bedroom is complex, and she constantly revisits the value of healthy communication. She pointed out that although your partner may never come around, their first reaction may not be their final reaction. She suggested keeping the conversation going at a later date, after they’ve had a moment to breathe.
Emotional Downloads
We discussed how unrealistic it is to leave work at work and how to effectively download your day with your partner. First and foremost, permission must be asked before we emotionally download, and we should not take things personally when our partner is not in a place to listen. It is crucial to have multiple sources of emotional support to help combat the feeling of rejection when this happens. “One person cannot be your one source of all emotional fulfillment,” Dr. O’Reilly warned.
Please tune into Episode 50 for the entire conversation with Dr. Jessica O’Reilly. She provided tips on combating boredom in the bedroom, reducing the risk of divorce, and the importance of normalizing imperfections.
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About Gent’s Talk
Bulova Canada presents Episode 50 of Gent’s Talk, available for streaming on Youtube, Spotify, Goodpods, iHeartRadio, Apple and Google Podcasts! It is filmed at StartWell Studios in Toronto. You can now catch Season 1 and 2 on all Air Canada flights! Your continued support throughout this journey is appreciated. Thank you!
